Admire my awful paint skills:
I have been thinking a lot lately about how we have two "selfs" if you will. One being the "self" that we think we are, and the other being the actual person we are. Obviously there is overlap between the two of these, of varying degrees for different people.
Recently I have been feeling the push of the boundary of the green overlap area expanding, and it sucks. It is hard to see myself do negative things that I don't really believe are part of "who I am". You know: "I am always perfectly calm with my children" and "I would never say extra rude things to my husband" and "I am lazy, but not that lazy..." when in actuality I am not so kind to my husband and children, and I am that lazy. Etc, etc, etc.
I suppose that by seeing them it gives me the opportunity to change, right? Too bad change is hard. Ugh.
I have been thinking a lot lately about how we have two "selfs" if you will. One being the "self" that we think we are, and the other being the actual person we are. Obviously there is overlap between the two of these, of varying degrees for different people. Recently I have been feeling the push of the boundary of the green overlap area expanding, and it sucks. It is hard to see myself do negative things that I don't really believe are part of "who I am". You know: "I am always perfectly calm with my children" and "I would never say extra rude things to my husband" and "I am lazy, but not that lazy..." when in actuality I am not so kind to my husband and children, and I am that lazy. Etc, etc, etc.
I suppose that by seeing them it gives me the opportunity to change, right? Too bad change is hard. Ugh.
2 comments:
I thought I was a really patient person before I had kids. I guess I had to be tested in that way. :)
Are you getting enough "me" time? That's important. Sleep is also important.
Other people pick up on that stuff better than we do, I think, too, because they're the ones who see the 'real' us. There is just so much to work on, so I am going to start picking one thing to do better.
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